You Deserve IT

"You DESERVE IT!" That is what the salesman kept saying at the end of the presentation. How many times do we hear that? The TV tells us. The radio tells us. The newspapers tell us. Sometimes they manage to tell us without telling us directly. It is insinuated. If you want to be a good parent, buy this for your kid. If you want to be a great husband, buy that for your wife. THEY DESERVE IT! The "it" can be as insignificant as a Frappe Cappuccino from McDonalds or as monumental as a new car, house, diamond, boat, or in our case, the Almighty mother of them ALL --- A TIMESHARE! We were told the entire presentation would be only 90 minutes and in return we would receive $100 worth of dining bucks and.... a FREE CRUISE! Time not being an issue for a change, we decided to have some fun. We handed over $40.00 to guarantee we would show up. We were promised a full refund at the end of the presentation which we did get back.

We showed up on time along with about six other couples. One wisely bringing their quite clearly sick 2-year-old so I knew the would be done in no time. I was jealous. We signed in and waited for our escort. Jim came and got us and whisked us off to the presentation room where the other couples were with their escorts. We made small talk and Jim truly seemed interested in us. Or, maybe he was just truly desperate for a sale. Jim promised that we would love the presentation and the gentleman who would be showing us their fabulous product. Finally the star showed up. Bill Boy Joe (BBJ) was a man in his 30's, a bit overweight, in a suit. He had a southern drawl that would melt butter; having grown up only 30 miles from Myrtle Beach. He talked about never going on vacation because he was too poor. He shared his very sad story of how terrible it was for him to have to go to the first day of school each year and share what he did NOT do on his summer vacation. He even confessed to actually lying one school year. His shame and embarrasment was palpable though it may have been more due to the fact that he it was pretty shameful to be using this as a sales technique.

BBJ's next step was to price out a typical vacation. We agreed that a cheap hotel room would set us back $100 per day. Food would no doubt be another $100 day day. Don't forget the enterainment. That is another $100 per day. He then did the math and based on $700.00 for a two weeks of vacation over the next 20 years, the figure was an astounding $28,000. Wowzer. Ron and I are still trying to figure out how by buying his timeshare we would no longer have to spend money on food or entertainment but at this point, there was just no sport in going down that road.

BBJ then showed us a picture of the typical hotel room of 2 beds, a bathroom, a coffee pot, small fridge and possibly microwave. All I could think of were the fun memories I have of sharing such a room with our kids. We ate cheap with donuts and juice in the morning, and whatever cheap for lunch and dinner. One of our happiest vacations was a hotel room in the DoubleTree at a Mall in Norfolk. The boys thought they had died and gone to heaven to actually "live" at the mall for a night.

We then were shown the timeshare room. It was a 2 bedroom, 2 bath, full kitchen apartment. We deserved it. He then finished up by telling us about his poor dead friend Bubba. His voice got very quiet and I believe he actually had a tear in his eye. He and Bubba reserved a time share at Daytona because being good old boys, they quite naturally were going to the NASCAR race at Daytona. Well as fate would have it, Bubba died quite tragically before the trip. BBJ was not going to go, but Bubba's parents said he DESERVED to go and Bubba would want him to be there. BBJ went out of respect to his friend Bubba and was so grateful he had such a nice timeshare to stay in. BBJ explained that by buying this time share we would be giving our children and grandchildren the vacation memories they DESERVED and I guess not the crappy ones that apparently we were guilty of sticking them with.

By the end of the now 90 minute presentation and we were still no where near done. Ron pointed this out to Jim when he came back to get us and he was genuinely shocked (at least he would like us to believe) that we were told only 90 minutes.

Jim wanted us to get in his car to go tour on of their ocean front properties. Following our rule of NEVER getting in a stranger's car, particularly one who did not even offer us candy, we refused.

The fun truly began when it was time to talk dollars. Apparently not only did we DESERVE the time share we also DESERVED 10 years of monthly payments at 16.5% interest along with a yearly maintenance fee of $1500.00. I think my most favorite part of the sales pitch was "look at what you will save over the next 15 or 20 years on vacations!" I wanted to say "Dude I have a 20% chance of being alive 5 years from now, what do you have for someone in that category?" I just did not have the heart to state that.

Needless to say, Jim and his very swarmy boss, Vic, were not happy with us because we just kept saying NO.

I believe they DESERVED IT!

Donna B

Stop the Presses!! A Rich White Girl Has Been Murdered

Tragic. Yeardly Love is murdered by a rich white guy who attends a top drawer university and the world comes to a halt. It is tragic that this young woman died at the hands of her obviously quite psycho ex-boyfriend. But, is it any less tragic when a poor woman of color is murdered by her equally psycho, but less well off, ex-boyfriend?

Every national news organization has carried the story. Women are murdered every day by their abusive ex's and it never makes the Today Show. But, take an affluent, attractive woman from a good school and have her murdered by her equally attractive, affluent ex, and we have national news.

Where are these same news organizations when a young woman of color is murdered? Where is the outpouring at candle light vigils when that woman of color is murdered? Why is there no president at the college or university of that poor woman of color, leading a vigil? Why does it appear that women from money and good schools, matter more? Is it any less of a loss for a parent of an affluent white girl than a less for an affluent parent, particular the parent of a girl of color?

When will our news organizations, and our society learn to place equal value on any life lost? We claim to not be racist but flock to the murders or disappearances of white girls from "good" backgrounds but give only cursory notice or worse yet, ignore the reports on the young women, who by no fault of their own, failed to draw the "affluent" white girl card.

I want to scream "WAKE UP!" to the media and others. We have to learn to value all lives no matter race, wealth, or religion. We have to teach our children that the value of a person is not made up by how much money they make or how pretty they are, or what color they are, but in the fact that they are a human being, on this earth, trying to do the best they can.

I feel terrible for Yeardly's parents. But I feel no less terrible for all the other parents out there whose daughters have been murdered but who failed to get the "press."

Sluts R Us

How slutastic can it get?? Rielle and Johnny. "Gee mommy! Why are you posed on my bed with the stuffed animals in nothing but your shirt? How desperate were you for your 15 minutes of fame to tell the world that daddy wanted you to abort me?"

Does anyone else envision a Made for TV LifeTime Channel movie in this child's future?

Thank you John Edwards and Rielle Hunter for taking us to an even better low. Woman hits on man who is married, has a wife diagnosed with stage IV cancer, and who has small children at home. Man, apparently forgets all the above and quite clearly does not care. The hurt and the misery that such selfishness causes is just unfathomable. I am waiting for him to whip out the grief card and maintain the death of his son made him do it. I am sure Rielle can tell us she has "daddy" issues.

Surely there is a country western song in the works: "Nothing says lovin like wanting to abort the bun in the oven. Oops Johnny." Or "Daddy can't keep it in his pants. What an unfortunate circumstance."

Prayers

"God answered our prayers." What does that truly mean? If I pray to God for the miracle of healing but that is not the outcome, does that mean God chose not to answer my prayer? What does that say about me? If someone prays for the health of their child and that child dies, does that mean God did not find that child worthy of saving?

When we read that someone's prayers were answered what does that mean for the rest of us? Could it possibly mean that God is there for us despite what our outcome is? Could it mean that by walking through what we walk through, God is using us in a grander fashion than the miracle receiver? I truly believe that God can perform the miracle of healing but I also truly believe that if healing is not the plan, that the same God can provide the courage and strength we need to accept what life brings us and provides us opportunity to be an instrument of his peace.

There is not a single one of us who would not expect and want to be healed from what afflicts us. Those afflictions can cover physical health, mental health; even economic health. I would never ever believe that it is too much to ask for a miracle and that I deserve that miracle as much as anyone else, but the reality is that if miracles occurred every time we asked, then is it truly a miracle? I am special, but am I any more special than my neighbor? I believe that is what has always led me to never ask "Why me?" When I ask that question I suggest that someone else should have this. Who would wish that on anyone?

So, the next time you want to say "God answered my prayer" stop and think what that statement truly means for yourself and others. When you pray for someone and the outcome is not what you had hoped for, then look for the meaning in that. If the answer is not what you expected, then look for the opportunities that God has provided, through the answer He has given.

Health Insurance - Priceless

For those of you who have health insurance I would like to ask you to take a few minutes and think about where you would be without it. When did you last see your doctor? If you have health insurance you probably either paid a copay or a percentage of the visit and home you went. What about an x-ray? The charge for a PET scan is $6K. Bone scan is a bargain at $2K. One visit to the oncologist for a 30 minute Zometa drip -- $3K. In one month, it is possible to accrue medical bills adding up to over $11,000 THOUSAND dollars without much effort. If you are fortunate to have health care you could end up with a $30 copay for Zometa, $200.00 for the bone scan and roughly $400 for the PET. Grand total is $630.00. Thank goodness radiology takes payments. The balance should be paid off just in time for the next bone scan and CT scan.

This is not about Democrat or Republican. Who cares who comes up with a plan. Do you think it really matters? Something has to be done or people will continue to be forced into choosing between being buried with medical costs or literally being buried.

Much like that well known commercial... Equal access to health care.... PRICELESS

Squirrel 0 Donna 1

Lesson 1: Squirrels love bird feeders

Lesson 2: Squirrels are pigs

Lesson 3: Squirrels are very, very persistent

We have a great bird feeder in the back yard. It is located right long the common area where there are trees and bushes. Proof that Ron and I technically have no life, we like to watch all the cardinals come in and feast. We have counted at least 8 out there all at once; some on the feeder, some on the ground under the feeder and others in the bushes or trees near the feeder. Unfortunately, we have found that where there is a feeder, there will be squirrels. Not sure why it makes me crazy that they get up on the feeder and chow down because as we all know, squirrels gotta eat too! They are just pigs though. It would be like serving an all you can eat buffet and the hot dog eating champion shows up hungry. Just not good.

We have tried the BB gun route but apparently squirrels have heard that the biggest risk of BB guns is that maybe it can put an eye out; so not much to fear. But, thanks to our son Daniel, we did discover a BB gun can put a hole in a bird feeder and actually even kill a bird, but that is another story.

I came up with the idea of taking Crisco and putting it on the bird feeder pole. Have no clue what I look like out there smearing it all over the place, but thankfully my neighbors are pretty used to me at this point. I looked out today and there were not 1, not 2, but 3 squirrels!! They were taking turns shimmying up the pole, getting up on the feeder, causing it to list to its side, dumping seed on the ground, so the squirrel buddies on the ground could reap the benefits.

I decided the rain had let up enough that it was worth trying the Crisco. I applied it and came back in the house. I sat at the table to do the puzzle and looked up and there was 1 squirrel shimmying his or her way up the pole. He or she made it half up and then slid completely back down. It tried it again and down it came again. It actually gave up after the third try. Do you think it went back to its buddies and reported a problem? Do you think the birds were laughing at it? Do you think Ron and I need to watch our back for squirrel payback? I can confirm for you that it is pretty funny seeing a squirrel losing its grip, holding on for dear life, sliding back down the pole.

My only concern now is fear that PETA will pick this blog up and we will be in big trouble.

Donna B

What If

I woke up at 3 a.m. this morning wondering what if this Thanksgiving was my last one. Morbid thought. Probably normal though. While I am pretty OK with walking through what is coming my way, I have my moments and apparently 3 a.m. this morning was one of those moments. I laid there for awhile just kind of feeling those feelings and then thinking about how many people probably had their last Thanksgiving and have no clue that it possibly could be. People die suddenly every day; some very tragically. Would they have spent Thanksgiving any differently had they known?

I decided a long time ago not to live my life by the what ifs but also realized early this morning that it is not such a bad thing to consider the what ifs. I enjoyed the holiday tremendously. I spent Thanksgiving morning at Fredericksburg Baptist facilitating breakfast for the community. What made it very special is that Ryan was there too. He chopped potatoes and cooked eggs. It was a nice mom moment. Michael arrived later with Frankie and later, Michael, Ron, Ryan and I all enjoyed a nice dinner. Frankie and Ginger parked themselves on the floor near the table in hopes that we would include them in the fun. No stress; just a nice day.

Candy cane Saturday was a lot of fun. I made a new pie which Michael willingly ate first in case it was not good so we could quietly remove it from the dessert table should it have been a failure. Is he a great son or what?

I have no clue if my re-diagnosis has helped me appreciate the days a bit more, but I will take it. I have said for years that my biggest fear as a parent would be that my children did not truly know that they were loved. My diagnosis years ago and this re-diagnosis helps me see that I have not failed and therefore I have nothing to fear.